I was on my way back to the office. I had been running errands for a trip I was going to be taking. I was on the highways when I saw a spider on my windshield. Poor guy was hanging on for dear life. As soon as I got off the highway and slowed my speed, the spider got up and ran for safety.
I felt like I should glean a lesson from this little spider but I didn’t know exactly what…
Then, it happened. My life seemed to be shaking. I was beginning to feel the wind kick up and I didn’t knew what would happened but I remember crying out to God saying, “I can’t take this much longer”. I knew I had to hold on to Jesus for what felt like dear life! I knew in that moment when life felt like a hurricane, I was supposed to just “endure”- just like in Ephesians 6:11, 13 & 14 when it says to “stand firm”. It doesn’t say keep running forward, it doesn’t say shrink back it just says stand firm. Sometimes that is all we can do and that is hard enough!
I had to pray every day so many times, God help me to endure. Help these days not to be wasted because I can do nothing else but endure! Have you had those days? Those days that getting your feet under your feeble body feels is like you’re attempting to climb Mount Everest? And when you do you feel like you’re being pelted so standing is the only thing you can do? Have you had those days?
I was living in the midst of wind that felt as though I was going to fly off if I tried to move in any direction. I remembered the spider. I’m sure that’s how he felt. He knew he couldn’t move until things calmed down, otherwise he risked death. So by God’s grace, He gave me the strength to endure and when I knew the winds had done what they were to do, and when I felt the chaos begin to calm, I ran into my refuge. He was in the storm but He also was my place to heal from the storm.
The winds of life change us. They break us apart and break us down. I used to think life was about being whole, but now I’m beginning to see its about being broken. When a vessel is broken, more light can shine through. As John Piper says, “The quickest way to the heart is through a wound” so if in my brokenness God reaches me quicker, than I pray to remain broken. Because even in our broken and wounded lives God allows us to be broken and wounded healers for someone else and that is truly living!
Don’t be afraid to be like that Spider on the Windshield. I would never want to experience what I did again, but I can tell you on the other side of the winds and the rains, I am thankful for the storm. I’m thankful for the hurt and I’m thankful for an amazing God who held me in the winds and held me after the winds- He never lets go!